Volume 6 – #1 – January 2003

I am so shallow, I embarrass myself sometimes. If not shallow, then certainly superficial and transparent. I’m usually more of a cliché than I like to admit and constantly find myself bogged down by the same old stuff that always bogged people down. I’m usually behind and apologizing for it. But, you know what, that’s just the way it is. None of us is all that unique. Individuality is kind of a cliché itself. This might be depressing, but it might also be liberating knowledge. We probably all try too hard anyway. If I can learn to embrace my shallowness maybe I’ll be more in touch with humanity in general. It’s like we’re a bunch of penguins. And some of us sleep more. And some of us wear sunglasses. And some of us like to race down snowy hills on our belly more than others do. Some of us want to be alone so badly that we run away from home or try to kill everyone else. Some of us can’t make eye contact. And some of us talk too much. It’s a duller quilt than I used to think. This is good to know. We’re still barely scratching the surface. We head off in weird directions. We think money/power is what it’s all about. But nothing ever really amounts to much. Yet each new generation fools itself into thinking how far they’ve come. Earth is probably just a temporary holding pen and, without knowing it, we’re just waiting to go to the next level. In the meantime we’re figuring out how to make this temporary home a little more bearable. Futile, in the big picture.

Speaking of money and power, happy days are here again. It’s time to dance in the streets. McDonald’s recently reported such a big loss that they’re closing 700 restaurants. I’m very sorry that people will lose their jobs, but I’m happy to think that there will be fewer golden arches on the planet. McDonald’s reflects a desperate, bored, lonely society. Not that this is a bad thing. Sometimes you’re just supposed to be desperate, bored and lonely. Those things are inevitable, but the idea that McDonald’s fits into someone’s daily cycle of desire is almost too sad to bear. Let’s Polka!

I used to love looking at guitars and amplifiers in the Sears Catalog. The brand name was Silvertone. I eventually talked my parents into buying me a Silvertone guitar with an amp built into the guitar case. What a great idea. I guess that’s like putting a bowling alley on a bowling ball bag. You can play anywhere. I think I knew that my gear was dorky, but I didn’t really care. It was good enough to impress a few people. And definitely good enough to make me one of the coolest kids at my junior high (middle) school. It was really pretty easy to be cool in Texarkana in those days. Texarkana’s a great name for a town, huh? It looks good on post cards. The B movie, THE TOWN THAT DREADED SUNDOWN was about a “phantom killer” that stalked Texarkana in the 1950s. H. Ross Perot grew up in Texarkana, but I don’t think he had any connection with the “phantom killer.”

By the way, if you wear fur, you’re either ignorant (you don’t know about the brutality involved) or arrogant (you don’t care). I applaud all efforts to stop the manufacturing of fur, especially in developed nations. And my hard line here has as much to do with the effect on the wearer as it does with the plight of the animals. Barbarians walk around wearing fur, flaunting their power over weaker creatures. There has been a recent effort to reintroduce fur to the fashion world. Don’t be duped by it. Animals suffer and humans harden.

MORE GROUCHINESS. I’ve been to see some movies lately and I’m usually there for the coming attractions/trailers. They’re always so full of mystery or intrigue or funny surprises. And they’re really loud and bombastic or tense and pensive. Almost always, when the preview is finished, I feel like I never want to hear about that movie again. I’ve already had enough. The movie itself may be great, but the self-important hoopla just overwhelms me. So, I would like to pose a new kind of trailer. Here’s how it would go. A man or woman walks on to the screen and tells a little about the plot. It should be interesting, thought provoking, enthusiastically delivered and clearly spoken. That’s it.

My Internet radio show, WORLD OF POLKA, will be back on www.247polkaheaven.com by mid-February. I told the programmers I didn’t want them to run any sausage ads during my show. I hope they took me seriously, cause I am one serious mofo! Get me a fast car, a hot chick, a gallon of Crisco, a dozen large cat’s eye marbles, a small island off the coast of South Carolina and a lifetime supply of edible cardboard.

Speaking of polkas, I will be part of a national polka think tank in Nashville in early February, during the Folk Alliance Convention. We will be discussing some very specific problems and goals. Some are unique to the polka world and some are traits shared by all traditional roots music. Anyway, it should be fun. I hope some heated discussions ensue. Come on people now. Smile on your brother. Everybody get together and let’s talk about polkas right now.

I live in Denton, Texas and the town newspaper, THE DENTON RECORD CHRONICLE, runs a little local citizen profile two or three times a week. One of the questions they ask in the profile is, “Who would be the four guests at your fantasy dinner party?” I thought about it and I would invite four friendly genies to my dinner party. Maybe they would all grant me two or three wishes each. I’m always scheming.

Make your plans now. Brave Combo will perform with the Denton Community Chorus on Friday, February 28th at the Margo Jones Auditorium on the TWU campus. As I understand it, we will play our music and they will sing.

Okay, it’s time to move on to another order of business. I hope your days are filled with wonder and amusement. But if they’re not, don’t worry about it. Go turn on the TV and get something to eat. Speaking of wonder, I wonder if we’re going to war. Adios, amigos.